Lentil Burgers

I had some leftover filling from my breakfast burritos (potatoes, onion, bell pepper, vegan cheese and tofu), and leftover cooked lentils from my mushroom lentil loaf... I decided they would be a perfect mix for some burgers. (One of my bosses told me that I'm not allowed to call anything vegetarian a "burger," but I think it's less incorrect than the "meatloaf" I brought in, sans meat.)

I'm finding that I can make a burger out of anything fairly pasty (for example, sweet potato, or in this case, the cooked lentils), then by adding breadcrumb and binder. I added some tahini to this mix, breadcrumb, and about two chia "eggs" (1/2 cup ground chia seeds, plus about 3/4 water). Mix, season (I used cumin, chili powder, a little ground fennel and salt and pepper). Mix by hand, keep tasting, and separate into patties to toast up in a pan.

I pre-cooked all of them, and then froze them in packs of two in aluminum foil in the freezer for re-heating.

Now that's so simple, we really need to talk about something else. I was wondering, are we really sure that Matthew Crawley is dead? I mean, he looked pretty dead. I realize that he was underneath the front wheel of a car and bleeding out the head, and then there's that frozen stare... But I'm thinking that there JUST might be a chance.

There's a small chance, right?

Breakfast Savory Crepe Burritos

I have a stepsister who lives in Washington state. If you can believe it, I don't think I've ever actually met her in the 25-some years my mom has been married to her dad. I do know, however, through my mom that she has been a dedicated vegan for many years. She gave me a great vegetarian crepe recipe, which involves chick pea flour and several ingredients. I've had them when my mom has made them for me, and they are very good. However, I have yet to buy any chick pea flour, and I don't often like too measure too many ingredients. So I came up with a "quickie crepe" recipe for savory crepes that is pretty good, and has fewer ingredients, and no measuring at all. The numbers listed are for "parts" - so, however much you like, in the following proportions:

• 1:1:1/2 parts Bisquick, whole wheat flour, and nutritional yeast, respectively 
• 1-2 Tblesp. miso paste, whisked smoothly into a little veggie broth, then added
• water and veggie broth until the mix is fairly thin 

So, that's one part Bisquick (vegan! Yay!) to one part WW flour, to a half part nutritional yeast. I just dump some Bisquick in the left side of a bowl, then add an equal part of the flour, then a half part nutritional yeast. Totally "eyeballed." The resulting crepes are just a little "puffy," and not as paper thin as a true crepe would be. However, they are satisfying and great for filling. I made breakfast burritos out of this batch, filled with a western-style tofu "scramble," lentils, and vegan cheese.

Tofu Scramble

1 diced baked potato (a leftover)
one diced bell pepper
one small diced onion
one package sliced mushrooms
1 block of pressed and crumbled tofu
garlic powder or blackening seasoning, salt and pepper
about a cup of cooked lentils, which I had withheld from my lentil mushroom loaf

I peeled my cooked potato (I make 5 or so baked potatoes at a time in the oven, so that I have them throughout the week for use in cooking, or to top for a quick lunch) and toasted it on high heat in a little vegetable oil until well-browned. Then I added and sautéed the pepper, onion, and mushrooms first, then added the tofu and lentils just to warm them through, and seasoned the mix. I put a little filling down the middle of a crepe, and added vegan cheeses on top. I folded them up, and decided that half would be plenty for a single breakfast!

I first folded them in Glad Press and Seal, then in aluminum foil. They "peel" more easily out of the freezer this way, are protected against freezer burn, and I can drop them in a bowl and re-use the piece of Glad wrap to re-heat them (about 2 minutes a side, covered and on high power).

Mmmm, steamy.

Now I have a hearty breakfast stockpile for the next several months, since I save these for my hurried work mornings.

German-ish Christmas Eve

I've hosted a few holiday meals since I've had the kids, but until this point, they've mostly involved paper plates at service time, lots of extra sticks and leaves in a messy front yard, a microwave I've had no time to clean that mornings splatter out of, and a very pretty vase that I'd put on the table, but forgotten to get flowers for. And I remember these things, because I've had the same two relatives who were only too happy to come over, and point these details out to me. Happy holidays!

Okay, so I'm starting with a little bile, there, but truly, TRULY, I love to host dinners. And I really do own a plate service, and some serving platters! So I was really excited when our friends Nick and Ania, and their two handsome little fellas could come over for a Christmas Eve dinner. My girls are just old enough to let me get some stuff done, and my sweet husband is only too happy to vacuum for me. (Also, we raked the leaves this year! Woo!)

Nick has a Germanic tattoo on his arm, and Ania is Polish, so I guess those things came together in my head to give me the idea of having a generally Eastern European, completely inauthentic-themed meal. You know - cabbage, potatoes, meat, and a beer or two. That sort of thing.

I started the meal with something that has nothing to do with Eastern Europe, and everything to do with "festive": Brooke's artichoke spinach dip, with toasted pita points.

Then, the one-two punch: the humbly self-titled World's Greatest Cornbread. I wanted to serve some bread with the meal, and nothing gathers compliments like Old Faithful. Also, I have put a piece of this bread on the bottom of a chili bowl many times, so I thought it work well to go under the brisket, and sop up some beefy juices. You see a clear theme now, right? Farm-y, Fourth of July picnic-y, BBQ-y, German-y. Makes sense to me.

Now for the brisket. My success in getting this meal together (with two kids three and under, and a heavier work-week up until the day before) is three-parted: 1) use internet rankings to find new recipes, and combine them with old stand-by's, 2) start everything two or three days ahead of time, and 3) get the groceries delivered. This last part freed up some extra time for me (for doing stuff like ironing tablecloths, and watching more television), and reduced my stress quite a bit. So I went with what was on special on Peapod - brisket!

I had never made it off the grill and in the oven, but my arch-nemesis, Paula Deen, had a very highly rated "Texas Oven-Roasted Brisket" recipe on FoodTV.com. Easy, no-fail, and no mayo or stick of butter added (as is her wont). It was very simple, very tender and we could have fed at least four more people with the 5 to 6 pound brisket. It made lots of juice in the pan that wasn't greasy (I had trimmed off the fat before cooking), and went down over the cornbread. (I did cut the salt down, as some reviewers had recommended). Mmmm. Many thanks to the Smiling Silver Blob for that one. (So mean, but come on. That woman won't rest until we all have diabetes.)

For sides, I didn't want to go too far over to the picnic side of things with lots of mayo. I had to have some warm German potato salad, which I've never made at home. I stumbled on this recipe, and was able to prep everything but the dressing ahead of time. I stored the cooked potatoes and bacon in a ceramic dish, then just took them out and put them over the oven vent on the range top while the brisket cooked. The potatoes warmed through, and I just had to mix the dressing. I've never made dressing like this, but the taste was just what I wanted it to be. It's a keeper!

Lastly, I had to have the stewed red cabbage that I've had in German restaurants. I got lucky again, and Googled up this recipe. Again, it tasted exactly like what I had pictured in my mind, and as a bonus, it might be the easiest thing I've ever cooked in my life. It actually started a small marital rift when Nick said to his wife, "I like this cabbage a lot. I'm not crazy about cabbage, but I would eat THIS cabbage." Don't slight a Polish woman's cabbage.

As usual, I just kept tasting and adding seasoning to everything as I went, which I think is the biggest secret to dinner-party success: taste it before you put it in the serving plate (and I added a bit more sugar to the German potato salad). Everything worked together really well, and I got some new "old stand-by's" out of the deal. Also, all of this stuff re-heated beautifully for almost a week! (I really should have invited more people).

For dessert, we had served coffee with some home-made candy: I got this idea for white chocolate lollipops from Ina Garten (nothing catty to say about that lady, I just love her food), and I made Ritz-cracker cookies, which are peanut butter and marshmallow fluff, inside a Ritz sandwich, rolled in melted Hershey bars. Sadly, I didn't get a picture of the huge batches of candy I made, but ah well! Some things have to fall by the wayside. I'll post about the cookies later... I added a pinch of coarse salt to the top of each of the lollipops, and I think it really worked well with the sweetness of the white chocolate.

With the delivered groceries and the head-start, I was able to help the elder child construct a centerpiece that would bait any plump little German kids into an old witch's oven (if this old witch were into that). I made the squiggles, but she dazzled me with her path creating, shingling and paving ability! As you can (partially) see, we had a lovely street light feature, until the younger child decapitated and ate it...

Incidentally, we bought the Wilton pre-baked gingerbread house, and I was shocked (at demolition time) at how delicious and flaky the gingerbread was. I expected it to taste like plywood, since the function was similar - but it had lots of spice. Lots of sugar, sure... But there's a time and place for that! (And the time is Christmas).

Hope your holidays were as happy as ours were!

Grilled Peaches

Grilled peach half, a tiny bit of brown sugar, butter, pinch of salt. Topped with mascarpone cheese and balsamic glaze. I had two of these as my dinner.

Tweaking the Pizza on the Grill

Okay, I'm getting really good at this, and I have to make some notes on what I've been doing: 425 degrees on the stone for 6.5 minutes. Instant polenta underneath for motion... You need some corn meal to slide the pizza off the peel, and onto the pre-heated stone on the grill. I've used stone-ground coarse corn meal, and it's like eating a pizza that's been dropped onto gravel. The instant polenta still has the ball-bearing effect, doesn't burn (like breadcrumb does), and isn't crunchy.

I used Trader Joe's whole-wheat pizza dough. I keep a bunch in the freezer and thaw them on the counter in the bag. The dough ball HAS to be room temperature, and if it is wet and tacky, it has to be well-floured all around before stretching. Then the peel has to be floured, and then a light coating of corn meal spread on. I build the pizza right on the peel. Don't wait too long - it will begin to stick, so get it on the grill.

This temperature is perfect. The dough will cook and rise before the bottom blackens. I check it at about 6 minutes. My grill has a thermometer on the hood. Not as hot: dough doesn't cook. Too hot: blackened crust.

This pizza is topped with mushroom sauce, and leftover sauteed spinach that I had cooked with garlic and onions. The cheese is a shredded mix, with parmesan and Italian herb seasoning added (gives it that pizza flavor). Lastly, I added basil from the garden after cooking.

Cameron's Chicken Dip

Superbowl week! Time to post some high-fat snack ideas. Also, I'm more or less on a diet, so I'm basically determined to ruin everyone else's. (I just have a food blog. I never said I was a good person.)

You might remember that my friend Brooke introduced me to artichoke dip my freshman year in college. Cameron's chicken enchilada dip is like that SNL Elvis sketch: "just like that... 'cept diff'rent." This dip is crazy good and highly addictive. Cam brought this dip to my friend Jenny's party, and he made the mistake of getting up to get the bag of chips. When he came back, it was GONE. No joke. (It was an awkward moment, as we sat there with full mouths and teaspoons, and Cam standing there with mouth agape). By the way, the guy in the back is Cameron, called "the Wookie" fondly by his, ahem, shorter friends.

(And much love to Mrs., and the Little Wookies). Here's the original recipe from allrecipes.com, and be sure to read Cameron and my notes at the end before making:

Original Recipe (Allrecipes.Com):

Ingredients:
1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese, softened
1 (8 ounce) jar mayonnaise
1 (8 ounce) package shredded Cheddar cheese
1 (4 ounce) can diced green chile peppers
1 jalapeño pepper, finely diced

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Place chicken breast halves on a medium baking sheet. Bake in the preheated oven 20 minutes, or until no longer pink. Remove from heat, cool and shred. Place shredded chicken in a medium bowl, and mix in cream cheese, mayonnaise, Cheddar cheese, green chile peppers and jalapeño pepper. Transfer the chicken mixture to a medium baking dish. Bake uncovered in the preheated oven 30 minutes, or until the edges are golden brown.

Cam's dip ALWAYS turned out noticeably better than mine, so I suggest you follow his alterations to the letter is you want the maximum yumminess! So here are the notes from Cam:

• "Always use either the Philly's neufchatel or the full-fat cream cheese, and usually the Hellman's canola mayo."
• "I do the chicken breasts in the crockpot for (2 hours on high, or 4-6 hours on low) with tequila and lime juice just to about cover the breasts, and Adobo spices and usually some garlic powder (or some other mexicany spice combination, I've done chili powder, paprika & cumin before, really, I think as long as there's some cumin from some source you are good to go) and just shred it with a fork in the pot."

• "I use the Mexican blend cheese in the 2.5 pound bag from Costco or shredded habañero cheddar (I think Cabot is the brand, its at Costco also). I use pickled jalapeño instead of fresh jalapeño, and tailor the amount to the spiciness I want (about 1 spoonful for mild dip (Cam's real word here: "weaksauce"), and about 4 or 5 coupled with the habañero cheddar for the mouf-burner)."

Okay, so here are my notes. Essentially, they are to dry all the chicken and diced peppers on a clean towel before adding. I've had real problems with overly wet ingredients - I'm talking DRY. I also like to add the cheeses and mayo slowly, so that it doesn't come out too wet/mayonnaise-y. However, you should taste the final mix before it goes into the oven. It may need more seasoning. I also prefer to use (despite the photo) a more oval/oblong pan, so that it bakes in a thinner layer, and you get more of the crusty top surface area, since it is the best part. And again, don't use low-fat anything.

Hope I haven't made it sound too difficult... It's actually really easy, just kinda one of those that comes out great, but you might want to play with it a little.

Miss you like crazy, Wookies!

Mill Race Inn

The scenic Mill Race Inn in Geneva, IL has closed its doors. The restaurant was situated on the banks of the Fox River, featuring an incredible view. The building was a blacksmith shop in 1892, and has been expanded since. Chris and I enjoyed a lovely meal there a couple of months ago, as a part of a road trip we took to drive the entire Illinois portion of the historic Lincoln Highway. The food was very good, though I think they catered to an older crowd with rich, home-style fare. Here are the photos I took while there.

We absolutely fell in love with Geneva, sitting at our brightly lit table, looking at the Fox River in its October glory. Ignore the trash can:

The salad featured more bleu cheese on the salad and in the dressing than I have perhaps eaten in my entire life.

I had the swedish meatballs... They were fabulous, and so was the pasta.

Chris had the slow-roasted breast of turkey, and said it was like an early Thanksgiving.

Anyway, sorry to post about food that you can't get any more... The restaurant sits in such a terrific location, I have to think that when the economy turns around, someone will take advantage and open a new eatery there. I would personally like to see some food served that is a little more on the modern side (and perhaps lighter: everything on the menu featured a cream sauce it seemed), but I must say the food Mill Race served was the tip-top of its kind.

Wayne's Pizza

About six months ago, I found out my cholesterol was slightly high. That was the wake-up call that I needed to lose the last fifteen pounds of pregnancy weight. Coming off Thanksgiving weekend (okay, week if I'm being honest), I'm back to eating big salads and righting myself again. But the week sure was fun while it lasted! And hey... Now that the weight is off, it's all part of the maintenance plan. (Meaning, I can hog out now and then.)

When one of those times comes around, one wicked place to eat is Wayne's Pizza in Arlington Heights, IL. They have a great thin crust pizza (my favorite is spinach and mushroom), and their "nibbles" are amazing. I love the cauliflower bites. I could drink a liter of their ranch dressing (yeah, if that sounds disgusting, try it... And then you tell me). And recently (dammit), I discovered that their chicken wings are my favorite (even over Hooters' wings, which I heard a rumor that they have changed, anyway). This place isn't paying me, so believe me when I say that if you eat here all the time? Your health is gonna suffer. But if you eat at Wayne's now and then... I think it might make your life better.

I! Have Made! Pasta! (Spinach Gnudi)

I've already admitted to the whole universe, here on this blog, that I'm not the greatest Italian in the world because I don't ALWAYS make my own sauce (that's because that world that I live in? It's the REAL one. Join me, there are babies here... Messy, but worth it!) Anyway, now I'll tell you another purulent, grotesque truth: I don't make my own pasta.

The last time I tried to make homemade pasta was when I was in grade school, with my father (who was Sicilian, and from New York, and bought his pasta from the store like most other Italian-Americans). We tried the same ravioli roller thingie that everyone else purchased during the time in the eighties when Julia Child, the Galloping Gourmet, and Jeff Smith were at the height of their popularity, and Dad sat with a pad and pencil next to our 13-inch black-and-white TV set every Sunday, trying not to miss any ingredients. (See if you can name all the technologies I pre-date with that sentence... It's fun!) We tried it once and only once. We kneaded and re-kneaded, rolled and re-rolled, cooked fillings, pressed and patted, and created a gigantic mess that culminated in the two of us declaring "Oh, eff this" and going to Arby's. Our roller thingie, along with all the other roller thingies from the eighties, ended up in a garage sale. Perhaps we aimed too high.

That's why I knew that when I saw this recipe from Giada (Yes! Yes, I AM the Everyday Italian!) it was ju-u-ust right. I had never heard of gnudi. They are a ricotta and flour dumpling that is larger than gnocchi, but smaller than... I dunno, a big meatball. I made mine smaller than hers, about the size of a Chicken McNugget (that way there is more sauce per bite). It came together so quickly, and just worked. No special knowledge or equipment needed. And it was filling yet light. It was just delicious. One thing you should know: the mixture may be kind of wet in the proportions she states... Just add a tiny bit more flour at a time until the dough is still moist and pliable, but not sticky. Then be sure to dust each in flour before dropping in the water. Simple enough to make on a weeknight.



I stored the leftovers with the sauce, and they re-heated beautifully. I printed this recipe, cut it out, and glue-stick-ed it into my recipe index file. Now with THAT commitment, you know I loved it!

Pizza Stone and Pizza on the Grill

Lookie my new toys!



I've been messing with this all summer. I bought a pizza peel (the big paddle), and a large rectangular pizza stone on Amazon.com. I went by the ones with a high rating. I have been buying the whole wheat pizza dough from Trader Joe's, and I've had a lot of success with that. But you could make your own. I tried Pillsbury refrigerated dough on the stone once, and it scorched on the bottom and was raw on the top. I had to throw it out. But at a lower temperature, it might have worked.

I started this because I've never had a crispy bottom crust in the oven, ever. Sure, Boboli work, but I wanted real pizza: chewy inside, floury on top, and crunchy on the bottom. Well, turns out you need a stone. And it could not be easier.

You build the pizza on the paddle, and you're supposed to use corn meal. Well, I've used Italian breadcrumb, and that seems to work okay. The purpose of this is just ball-bearings... You know, to move the dough off of the peel easily. The stone gets pre-heated on the propane grill (or in your oven). Mine gets up to just over 400 degrees (medium-high works pretty well). Also, you MUST use room temperature dough. Otherwise, it's like trying to roll a rubber band. Also, it won't puff up while cooking.



I use marinara out of a jar, but I've found it can be watery. You can mix it with tomato paste and heat it, or barbecue sauce. Or, just touch a paper towel corner to the watery parts when it comes out, and the water will wick up into the towel.



I've made all kinds of pizzas this summer, but all a little bit healthy. Turkey sausage, sun-dried tomatoes, mozzarella... Take my advice and use the shrink-wrapped cheese, not the kind in water. Too much water on your pie. And I dunno about you, but I've never sat on Santa's lap and asked for a watery pie.



After some trial and error (and a lot of blackened dough), turns out these babies cook in about four minutes! (Lets see Domino's beat that). But you want to burn it just a LITTLE bit... This is supposed to simulate the coal or wood-burning pizzeria oven, after all!



I also bought a honkin' pizza blade to cut the pizza with, shaped kind of like a saber and a mezza luna combined (they have them at Bed, Bath and Beyond). Your little wheel just isn't ready for this kind of crunch.

Swiss Pita Burger

If you put spinach on something, it's "florentine," and if you put mushrooms on a dish, it's "swiss." Those are the rules, I don't make them. (This burger isn't so much of an alternative burger, but I did put it on pita bread. So there's your alternative.)



I sautéed and seasoned the mushrooms in the pan that I cooked the burgers in. I put the 'shrooms on the burgers, melted the swiss on top, and added Country Bob's steak sauce. If you're not familiar with Bob's, you should get there. Like Tracy Morgan says, "I'm down" with Bob's "like four flat tires." If you put Bob's on a bank vault, I think I'd gnaw through the steel door. This sauce would make me eat my mother's pork chops.

I liked the whole-wheat pitas on these, because the bread was basically a vehicle for what was between it: the meat, cheese, mushrooms, and the Bob's. In fact, with those toppings, you could easily use turkey meat or a veggie patty, and it would still taste good. (Not as good, but that's just my opinion).

Lamb and Feta Burger

Did I say I was doing these burger posts beginning July 4th? My, how time flies! Well, it might take me until next summer, but I'll get the rest of these alternative burgers up. I'M BUSY. In fact, the dedicated reader will spot the backdrop in this next picture: the kitchen I moved out of in January of 2008. But I remember how good these burgers were!



This ground lamb burger is based on a recipe I have printed in Bob Sloan's wonderful book, "Great Burgers." I based it on his "Lamb and Feta Burger with Cumin-Yogurt Dressing." I'd reprint it here for you, but A) I'm not sure I have permission to do that, and B) I didn't really follow it closely anyway. I found ground lamb at Joe Caputo's (but any real butcher is likely to have it, just probably not "the Jewel's," as Dad would say). I seasoned it simply, added a packet of crumbled feta, some toasted pignolis, and dried Italian seasoning. The yogurt dressing was greek yogurt with cumin and lime juice, and I sautéed the spinach with some simple seasoning, and finished it with some red wine vinegar at the end. And I didn't measure anything.



I served them on pitas as Bob recommended. They were a bit rich (the lamb has a rich flavor), but nice for a new option.

Turkey Marinara Burger

What better time to post a run of burgers than the week of July 4th? Most of these are "alternative burgers," since I thought perhaps this might be the only time of the year when we all might be a little burnt out on the regular kind. In the last week, I've seen a thick, juicy looking, Grade A veggie burger at not only J. Alexander's steak house, but Wrigley Field as well. It's a beautiful time to be alive, friends.



I'm starting things off with something simple (it IS a holiday, and I've had a long day of rainy ball games, dinners out, baby baths and two Old Styles, though not all concurrently). This is a ground turkey patty, having seasoned the meat with Italian seasoning and garlic, salt and pepper. I topped it with melted mozzarella, marinara, and put it on a toasted, buttered roll. I also had some leftover pesto, and I shmeared that on the bottom part of the roll, though you don't necessarily need that part. Deliziosamente sciatto! Which means, "deliciously sloppy." I think.

Beata's Hoot Owl Cutlets

These are bad. BA-A-A-AA-D. But they are so good, you know? (I sound like a guy in a leather beret from a 1980 cop movie explaining to the uptight lead, "Naw, man. Bad means GOOD.") These are definitely in that "meat candy" category: sweet and savory, and fried and cheesy. In short, the perfect food.



Remember the meat-a-riffic baby shower that I went to for my friend Beata? Well, here is yet another entry on something fun she had there. She made these breaded cutlets from pork, but I used chicken (pounded out). I asked her how she got such a great breaded crust, and she said she double-coated them in Italian breadcrumb. So that's flour, then beaten egg, then breadcrumb, then egg again, then breadcrumb. Then she fried them, and put pineapple slices on top, and American cheese and put them under the broiler for a minute or two. Is she brilliant, or what?

She didn't call them "hoot owls," but that's what they looked like to me. (Now you know what you're bringing to your next Harry Potter party.)



I'm not usually an American cheese fan, but it just seemed right on these. They have that feel of a recipe you'd get from a 1950s cookbook, called "Luau Chicken" or "Hula Pork," where a ring of canned pineapple counts as an exotic ingredient from the south Pacific. And you just need American cheese for that.

These take a TON of breadcrumb, and I can only eat about half of one at a sitting. Which is probably advisable, since I don't want to know how much fat is in one of these. I'm calling it special occasion food, when you're "feelin' kinda cutlet." Or maybe when one of the kids gets glasses, and needs a little giggle!

Battle Potato

My good (well, she's "great," actually) friend Ann has a sister who is battling MS. Every year Ann joins in the fight against the disease by captaining a team for the MS Walk (to hear Ann and her sister Maggie's story or to make a donation at any time, go here.) As a "thank you" to her friends and donors, she threw a party this year and called it "Battle Potato," in the style of Iron Chef on the Food Network. In case you're the last person on the planet not to see the show, everyone was to bring a dish with potato as an ingredient. Then the guests vote on their favorite, and the winner jumps on his or her cutting board, and shouts "IN YOUR FACE. FOR MS RESEARCH" at all the other guests, while brandishing a butcher knife. And now (it must be said), "Allez cuisine!"

Ann decorated the place all purty with potato centerpieces.



The guests who cooked were given numbered cards to place by their dishes, for the vote later on.



One gi-normous nerd brought a title card for her dish, and pinned her number to the card with an Idaho potato button that she just happened to have brought. Who's the geek?



My card reads, "Twice-baked ranch potatoes with scratch chicken BBQ." Poor Ann had other guests asking her, "where's my title card?" And she had to keep saying, "Uh, she made that." Well, you know what? You could have made your own, too. Don't hate the player.

There were more dishes than I imagined would be there. Curry salad, egg pie, thai dishes, and au gratin. I began to sweat. And eat. Eat and sweat.



I really, really enjoyed the food. When I saw the potato desserts, I knew it was over. There were chocolate-dipped chips, and cream-cheese frosted potato spice cake. There were DOUGHNUTS. How do you compete with that? Might as well just fill my plate.



Some folks got in a time-crunch, and were still courteous enough to go and get what people really like, and then arrange it artfully on a plate. Thanks Abby! Truthfully, I probably had more of the fries than anything else... So now I was contending with food science. You can't argue with years of testing for aroma and "mouth feel."



Or, have some red wine.



Then, form a totem pole, because it mocks both ancient Native American customs as well as your own ridiculously short stature. Everyone wins!



After eating, we all were to vote once for "Best Tasting," and once for "Most Creative." Ann had potato-shaped ballots to write the numbers on, and Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head receptacles to put them in. Aw, shmoosh.



And when the votes were tallied, my friends Anna and Adam won for "Most Creative" for their chocolate-dipped chips, and I won for "Best Tasting." Yay! I think it is POSSIBLE that some people pitied the sad girl who made the title card... Or as Jason ribbed me (who baked the cake at #6), he was pretty sure some of his votes got construed as my #9. Also possible. But Jeff said, "I counted those votes. I know my sixes from my nines." What's an election without controversy?

My prize was a colander, filled with everything needed to make a pasta dinner. Which is crazy, because that's exactly what I gave Ann as a wedding gift about a decade ago, only with a double-boiler instead of the colander. So now, I'm pretty sure I owe her a wedding gift. Still, I'm stoked because I can really use that colander!



I can't wait until this party goes again next year. And if I win again, I'll try to be more careful brandishing that butcher knife. (Sorry honey - but you were already missing most of your hair anyway, right?) Thanks for the party, Ann. It was awesome.

Here's my recipe for the potatoes, only this time, I added Hidden Valley Ranch Dip mix to the potato mixture. I also refrigerated the baked potatoes overnight in their foil, and they were a lot easier to scoop out the next day.

Artichoke Cream Pasta

Chris recently brought a regular sale to my notice through Amazon.com. You can get subscriptions to lots of magazines, many times, for $6-$10 for the whole year (or sometimes two years.) I treated myself recently to a dirt-cheap subscription to Cooking Light. I really like it. I've read many foodie periodicals over the years, starting with my father's old addiction to Gourmet magazine. Cooking Light is one part lifestyle mag (like Gourmet), and the second half has most of the recipes. I've already tried several, and they've all turned out well.

This one is an artichoke, lemon zest and pea pasta that is based on a recipe that they had. Of course I took my usual cursory look at the recipe, but I put onion and garlic in a liberal amount of oil first. Then I added drained and rinsed artichoke hearts, and peas, a little white wine and the zest of a whole lemon. Then I seasoned the mix. Lastly, you add cooked pasta and about a half-cup of ricotta cheese, and just stir until mixed.



It was good, but I must say, I have never eaten a dish that so BEGGED for bacon. I think if I had started the mix with a little diced pancetta, it would have been so much better. As it was, it tasted a little flat. Either that, or leave out the ricotta, and I think the zippier flavors (like the lemon) may have come through more. Quick way to make a cream pasta, though!

Easy Galumpki Bake

Recently, I was at my friend Beata's baby shower. She and her husband are Polish, and they had lots of Polish friends, who brought quite a bit of Polish food. And when I say, "they brought quite a bit," I mean in the way that Sitting Bull brought quite a bit of Cheyenne to a small party with Custer. It was astounding. After we all ate our fill, Beata announced, "And now, we eat dinner!" Holy crap. That's when the meat really came out. Dear lord, the meat! If meat makes for a healthy baby (and I think I'm a testament to that), then this kid is gonna be Herculean.

One of the many tasty, meaty items was galumpki, which I think most people have had at one time or another. They're also called cabbage rolls, and that's just what they are: rolled cabbage leaves with rice and pork in the center, and tomato sauce on top. All through my childhood, my father made them, and mistakenly called them "pigs in a blanket," which they are not.

They're great, but not so easy to make. The cabbage leaves have to be blanched, and the rice pre-cooked, and then of course there's all the rolling. I made a sort of "deconstructed" galumpki in the slow cooker, which is also a bit healthier because it uses turkey. It tastes great (much like the original), and utilizes a much simpler "open package, dump contents" sort of technique.



Ingredients:
1 carrot, peeled and broken up
1 celery stick with leaves
1/2 onion
1 clove garlic
(if you made the Turkey Chili Mac, then you already have these in your fridge)
1 cup uncooked brown rice
1 bag of cole slaw mix (shredded cabbage and carrots)
1 lb. ground turkey
1 cup water
1 29 oz. can tomato sauce (puree)
salt and pepper

In layers, place half the bag of cabbage mix, then half the mix of the first four veggies, which you've pulsed to a fine chop in the food processor. Add half the rice, then tear half the turkey up into chunks to complete the first layer. Make sure you season the meat. Then repeat each layer once more, and season again. Add the sauce to the top, and the water. Cook on low for six to eight hours.



Serve with crusty bread, with parmesan cheese on top. Mm!