Soft Pretzels

Saw a new recipe in the usual way... On Pinterest. If you know me, you know that nothing goes straight to fond memories for me like a soft pretzel. They evoke lots of memories of my father, and yes, Hot Sam at Lincoln Mall.

Here is the recipe link. Everything went very smoothly and fairly effortlessly. I used my own little hands, and no paddle attachment. The only changes I made were:

1) The amount of baking soda stated will not dissolve in the amount of liquid stated. Add a little water, and it will still all go well.

2) I used half whole wheat flour, and half APF. I like whole wheat pretzels, and I was hoping these would taste more like an Auntie Anne's pretzel. They do.

3) I rubbed vegan butter all over these bad boys when they came out, then covered them in cinnamon, salt, and Sugar in the Raw. If that sounds naughty, that's because it is. They might look like little piles of doggie doo in my photo, I dunno, but they taste unbelievably, sinfully good. Quite unlike doo.

Mine only took about six minutes to bake, on a sprayed cookie sheet. This will be happening again. I think next time I might make a chocolate spread for them just like they used to have at Hot Sam, though that's just for nostalgia, because they surely don't need it.

Thanks for pinning, Susan M.!

The Christmas Project 2012

Just as I did last year, I wanted to make up some give-away gifts for Christmas - to teachers, Sunday school teachers, the family Christmas at Grammy's, to the postal carrier, co-workers and etc. I wanted to do something made by hand. Because when you make stuff by hand, people know you care, and you think, "I won't have to spend quite as much money, since I'm putting the effort in," so it always sounds like a great idea to share the love and not break the bank. Twenty trips to JoAnn Fabric later, the budget idea is just about out the window, but the love remains.

Plus, it keeps my kids amused for whole seconds at a time, and hopefully makes some memories. I used the following photo of the girls in their favorite aprons to print out gift tags for the gifts.

My gifts this year were a combo-plate of ginger cookies, Ritz cracker chocolate-covered cookies, and white chocolate snowman pops. I could alter it to suit - the folks at work got a big platter of cookies and snowmen, the girls' primary teachers got all three candies, family got all three, the Sunday school teachers got bags of cookies, etc. I wrote down everything I wanted to give everyone and made a tally. I love lists, so this part was fun. Then I hit the sales at JoAnn for all the cookie bags, platters, ribbon, and lollipop wrappers.

The ginger cookies got the most rave reviews, so I will for sure be making those again next year. I used a vegan recipe from Alicia Silverstone's site that I saw on Pinterest. I quadrupled the recipe, and I think I may need to do even more next year. I pretty much doubled the spices (NOT the ginger, though), including a mulled cider mix they sell at my grocery store that has orange peel, clove and other spices. I ground it in the spice grinder first. I'd say the seasoning was just right - it tastes more bold in the dough, but mellows after baking - so I may add just a touch more next year. I wanted the cookies to be frosted, so I used this vegan royal icing recipe. Instead of soy milk, I used Silk Egg Nog, and I also added a touch of nutmeg. I used holiday cookie cutters that I found at the dollar store, plus a couple others I already had. I made a lot. Of. Cookies.

I didn't fuss too much over the icing - I just snipped a corner of a Ziploc bag, and swirled it over the cooled cookies in the general shape of the cookie. I let them dry out on parchment paper overnight, so that the icing would be nice and dry for packaging.

The girls enjoyed the confectioner's sugar most of all. You gotta love that kids like their sweet stuff as "straight diesel." It's also just fun to play with. I put this picture on the back of our tags, noting that no one licked their fingers until the end, and that we used very clean hands. :)

Next up was the snowman chocolate pop. I made these last year, based on an Ina Garten recipe, and spent a great deal of time trying to arrange the cranberries and cashews so that they didn't resemble faces. This year, I thought, "I'll just make them into faces." I bought half-cashews for smiles, and dried cashews. The only changes I made to Ina's recipe is that I used the JoAnn melts for simplicity, and I put a good sprinkle of kosher salt on each one before they hardened. The nuts, cranberries and white chocolate just cry out for salt. Plus, it makes them look snowier.

I made lots more than this. Lots.

The last item I made (on the third separate day), was the Ritz cracker cookie. I don't think I made enough of these, but dang, I was running out of freezer space! They are a Ritz cracker sandwich, with a very thin layer of chocolate peanut butter (or Nutella) and marshmallow fluff in the middle. You then use melted Hershey bars to dip them in. Don't use anything for these other than Hershey bars, or the texture will be wrong. Don't.

This year, I found sandwich cookie molds at JoAnn, and it simplified the process a bit. I let the girls put candy sprinkles in the bottoms of the molds, then put a bit of melted chocolate in, then the cookie, then more chocolate. I put them in the fridge, but found them to be very difficult to unmold... Popping them in the freezer fixed this. They popped right out, but I did shatter one mold this way. Sounds like a lot of trouble, but I found it easier than hand-dipping each one.

I stored everything in the freezer until needed for bagging and packaging.

I thought I took a picture of all my pretty boxes and bags (the end product), but I guess I didn't. So here's one more of the girls, who used the very last two ginger "Joobies" (named for the combo of the girls' names) to put out on a plate for Santa at Grammy's house (the carrot is for Rudolph). Then they ate them, because they know that fat man is coming either way, and they are so not worried about it.

On Your Way... To the Lincoln Highway. With Nerds.

Time to take you along the culinary portion of the journey we took last October. We wanted to drive the entire Illinois portion of the Lincoln Highway, stopping wherever we may. We did this for two reasons: one, because we're cheap and wanted to save our big bucks for a trip to Napa in the spring, and two, because we're nerds. It was actually wonderful. I learned so much about my state, and the history of this amazing historical road that stretched (and still does) from coast to coast. When you come off the deadly monotony of the highway travel, with the unchanging scenery that we've become used to, it provided endless sources of fun and (yeah, I'll say it) LEARNING along the way. Don't get me started. Just rent the movie "Cars."

I won't bore you with are pictures from the whole trip. I'll just bore you with the food-related pictures. If you're really interested, come to my house and I'll show you the whole photobook I made, including every marker, mural and gazebo we stopped to photograph.

Oh, well. Just one.

Aw, lookit 'im. He's cute, isn't he, folks? Are you lookiting? LOOKIT.

Anyway, Route 30 starts on the eastern edge of Illinois in Lynwood. I don't know if you've been there, but I wouldn't plan a trip any time soon. It may be the most frightening place I've ever been, well above Humboldt Park, where I used to live and shared a block with more than one corpse that I viewed on the news while I did my morning workout. This was some sub-Detroit, post-apocalyptic shit, folks. Boarded, abandoned buildings everywhere, trash-littered streets, and just a couple poor souls shuffling zombie-like along the streets in bedroom slippers and toting plastic sacks (containing, I assume, human heads for snacking). Even the photo opportunity of a hot-dog painted propane tank couldn't prompt me to get out of the car in Lynwood, so I contented myself with recording "fun-spelled" words on the signs we passed, such as the "Dari Whip Snack Stop" (in Steger, where I really wished they'd gone the distance and eliminated the "h"), and "Unlimited Food's" (owned, I suppose, by the Food). With no transition whatsoever, the war-zone of  Lynwood became the mind-blowing historical mansions of Chicago Heights. They must have some amazing burglar alarms. You know. For the zombies.

We drove through Frankfort, Mokena, New Lenox (which has an Aurelio's AND a Chicago Dough, just like Bradley-Bourbonnais), and onto the glorious Joliet. We stopped into the Rialto Theater, the Chalkboard and Toy Town, and our first Lincoln memorial. We passed by the Big Chill Bar and Grill, Joe's, and the Ace Drive-In, all of whom I'd love to hear about or stop into one day. We did go into Dan's Homemade Candies, which has been open in the same building since 1919. Even before that, the place was another candy shop.

I only wish I had photographed the candy. Honestly, I think I just began wolfing it down all too quickly. What can I say? Absolute perfection. Hand-dipped, handmade candies that will make you ashamed you held Fannie May in such high esteem for so long. (Fanny is good, but it ain't this good). And it was here that I decided I would photograph not only the places we went to on our trip, but the people I spoke to along the way. I didn't get her name, but she told me all about Dan's, and she was the only one who didn't run into the back of the kitchen when I whipped out the camera.

Go to Dan's, fill your nostrils with the scent of (and your belly with the reality of) chocolate, particularly their mouth-watering caramel apples. Next stop: Plainfield, Illinois!

The Best Hot Chocolate

Bring it on, winter part deux! I've got Amazon.com, and nothin' but time...

This hot chocolate (Land O' Lakes brand) was rated by the America's Test Kitchen taste testers as the best, so of course I had to try it. The Supreme is the best!!

Fiber One Choco-Banana

Seriously, get on board the Fiber One train. These taste great! (And I eat mine with a banana, as in the "serving suggestion.")

Portillo's Chocolate Cake

I'm somewhat back "on the wagon" right about now, watching my calories and portion sizes. Of course, this doesn't apply to weekends, or holidays, or that time of the month. In fact, with all my trangressions, I'm really surprised that I've lost any of the fifty pounds that I gained while pregnant at all. Twenty of that was baby, and whatever the baby is in that I don't really want to think about. The rest has been coming off slowly, and none more slowly than these last eight pounds or so. I'm determined to do it, but no one can stop me from fondly reminiscing about the type of eating that I did during my last month of pregnancy. That was the stuff!

Two weeks before Ruby came along, I wanted cake. I wanted Portillo's chocolate cake. But a whole Portillo's cake is a little on the expensive side at about $18. And buying one piece per day until you have a baby (because you're kidding yourself into thinking you just want ONE piece), as I knew I would end up doing, is even more expensive. (Oh yeah, a piece of cake per day? As that commercial says, "I was there.") I heard a rumor on the radio: the caller claimed that he used to work at Portillo's, and guess what? The cake is just Duncan Hines' Moist Deluxe chocolate cake mix (some claim it is Betty Crocker, whatever), mixed with 3 eggs, 1 cup of water, and 1 cup of mayonnaise. Yes, mayonnaise. Just ignore what else it says on the box, and just add those things, and bake at the temp the box recommends. I don't know if this rumor is true or just an urban myth, but let me tell you, I will not ever need another cake recipe. No seriously, I'm good with this one.



I topped it with store frosting, and it was fantastic. No muss, no mess, just a teeny bit of measuring, and it was just as good as Portillo's, if not better. I think it is even better than the Hershey's chocolate cake recipe, which until now has set the bar for me. And I didn't need to boil water! The cake was so good, in fact, that I made one the very next week. And then I literally had a baby.



This last one is my favorite. At the school cafeteria, they always served chocolate cake with white vanilla frosting. I had it all through gradeschool. It was one of the only things the school did well - always so moist (and I seriously hate that word, but "tender" is for meat, and "damp" and its ilk are even worse) and perfect. I was always so geeked to see them serving it, and it is still my favorite.

You gotta try it, but I'm warning you: be nine months pregnant, or have guests over... Because you WILL eat it by yourself!

AMENDMENTS: I just made one of these with Light Mayo (Hellman's) and it worked... But it is definitely NOT the same cake. Just a decent, light cake.

Also, did you know that coffee brings out chocolate flavor? Use a cold cup of coffee instead of the cup of water, and it brings out the cocoa flavor (you won't taste the coffee.)

Fudge-O-Rama

Last year at Christmastime, we were home shopping, selling our condominium, and trying to get pregnant. It was a lot to deal with at one time. My brother tells me I'm always trying to do two or three life-changing things in one year, and I think he's right. But you know, we had to get out of that condo if we were going to raise children. It was a lovely place for the two of us to live for the first four years of our marriage, but have I ever showed you the microwave that we had?



The handle, where you see the chip at the top, fell into some soup I was making one day, and I had to fish it out (in a restaurant, you would have thrown the soup away, but that isn't happening at my house.) And note the classy repair at the bottom of the handle:



Do you have new respect for me as a cook, or what?

Anyway, of course we had to replace the microwave before we sold the place. We replaced closet doors, cabinet fixtures, had the carpet steam-cleaned, repainted chipped areas of the walls and all that home-selling stuff... But let me tell ya, none of that stuff would have mattered if there were rubber bands and garbage bag ties on the microwave, would it?

Needless to say, with all the repairs, closing costs, a fat down payment on the new place, paying a realtor and a couple of home inspectors (we had a couple of homes we decided not to buy after the inspection), we were kind of short on funds last year. So I gave a whole lotta fudge away as gifts.



I doubled, or possibly tripled, my favorite fudge recipe (be warned - you need a BIG pot and a strong stirring arm for that so that the chocolatey mass doesn't burn) and let it all cool. Then I cut it into squares, and put the squares on small cupcake liners with a holiday theme. Then I put several into a wax-lined baked goods bag (they have all this stuff at the regular grocery store) and kept all the bags in the fridge. Just be warned: use the plastic or waxy bags, or you'll have what looks from the outside like a bag o' grease, and no one wants that in their stocking.)

I gave one to the realtor, one to a neighbor, two to my husband's bosses, some to coworkers, one to my architect patient who looked at a house's foundation for us for free, etc. They make great presents to have on hand for those kind of folks, and what's better than a homemade gift? And let's face it, any time I can get sweets without baking is an ideal situation for me.

My favorite fudge recipe is the one on the back of the Marshmallow Fluff jar: "Never Fail Fudge." That's right! "Ancient Chinese Secret, huh?"

2 1/2 cups sugar
1/4 cup (1/8 lb.) butter or margarine
1 small can (5 oz.) evaporated milk
1 jar (7 1/2 oz.) Marshmallow FLUFF
3/4 tsp. salt
_________________________
3/4 tsp. vanilla
1 large (12 oz.) package semi-sweet chocolate pieces

Combine first five ingredients. Bring to a boil over a moderate heat, being careful not to mistake air bubbles for boiling. Then boil slowly, stiffing constantly, for five minutes (to soft ball stage.) Remove from heat. Stir in chocolate and vanilla until chocolate is melted. Then turn into a buttered 9 x 9 inch pan and cool (I prefer to put it into a foil-lined pan that has been sprayed with Pam, because it is easier to get it all out that way).



That old kitchen wasn't all bad... I sure do miss that gas stove! I'm still not used to the electric stove here. One day I will treat myself to a gas stove again. Until then, I will probably have several burned batches of fudge...

My Fancy Hostess

While getting larger and larger, I think Chris has lost more and more weight "stepping and fetching" for me: because getting up off the couch is just hard right now. While sick in the first trimester, I didn't get up much at all. I'd like to say that I'm just as active as I was before I got pregnant, but contrary to my high expectations for myself, taking a slow walk for a half hour is a real source of pride for me right now. When I used to be heard saying, "Hey! I did FIVE miles in under 45 minutes today!" you might now hear me saying, "Hey! I totally got up and walked after my nap today, instead of just eating and going back to bed!" I need a t-shirt that says, "Just Happy to be Ambulatory." And maybe it should have one of those slow-moving alert triangles on the back.

To further disappoint those who haven't yet walked a half-mile in a pregnant lady's overstuffed shoes, I must also admit that I've fallen into the habit of a little something sweet and a big glass of milk before bed. I sleep so much better this way. And I've been watching a lot of cook shows, like "Next Food Network Star" since the nausea left town. I think it is rubbing off on Chris, because he fancied up my snack the other day. Dig the chocolate swirl!



The plates are some that I found on deep discount after last Halloween at Jewel. They were in stacks as sets, with the black crow figure interchanged with a black cat silhouette, a jack-o-lantern, or a spider. I mined out all the crows that I could find and just bought those (and I don't remember where I acquired the Miss Piggy "Pigs in Space" Welch's glass, but she's been with me a long time.)

Thanks, Chris, for all your stepping and fetching. You'll get your wife back, at least somewhat, before the year is out!

Chocolate Amish Friendship Bread

Well, hello dere!

I am officially back from hiatus. I am a bit over four months pregnant now, and mercifully over my nausea. I can look at food, and eat food (and now I can post about food). It is wonderful. For the last two weeks I have felt blessed every day.

I have a lot of photos to catch up on. I'm going back to Christmas, here! The organization is probably going to take me most of the day today. But we've moved to another town, and first I have to find the USB cord to my camera...

Well, here's one that was already in the hopper. Are you familiar with Amish Friendship Bread? Someone makes you a live yeast starter. They give you a bag with the dough starter and the live yeast in it, plus a set of instructions. Most days, the instruction is, "Mush up." Then you add some flour and sugar: once during the proliferation phase, and once again right before you bake.



The batter will bubble up in the bag, showing you that the yeast is growing. It just sits on the counter and does its thing. At the point of baking, you are to split the starter off into several new bags. Then you have some new starters to give to other people, and one to bake with yourself (that's why it's called friendship bread.) Who knows where these things actually got started, or how many times these little yeasties have gone around the country?

My friend Kira first made me the Amish friendship starter when I lived in Peoria... And I was too broke to buy a new bag of flour and sugar to actually make the bread, so sadly my little yeasties died unfufilled. I didn't see another starter for several years. You don't have to wait for someone to hand you a starter, however. Here are directions for creating your own starter. You can do this with packaged yeast. Just remember the cardinal rule of Amish bread (which as it turns out, is probably as Amish as I am): no metal spoons! No metal bowls! And no wire hangers! EVER!

Just be ready when you get into this. I last made this when my boss and his wife went out of town, and she trusted me to perpetuate her starters. They were gone long enough that I had to turn the starters over twice. That means shucking myself of six total starters, and making four loaves for myself. Finding "homes" for the starters is not always easy. I don't have a lot of friends who are into baking. I tried to give the first set to family members, and they were all like, "Ucchhhh..." The responsibility! You don't want to let the little microbes die, and then YOU have to find three people to give the starters away to. And a lot of people, it turns out, are not into having living things on their countertops. Several people I asked in my playgroup were convinced that bacteria was growing in there. My arguments that a proliferation of yeast suppressed any blooms of bacteria fell on dead ears. Folks don't realize that there is yeast in most any bread they are eating, either. You have to eat things that were once alive, people. Rocks are not an option.

Anyway, if you are successful in giving the starters away, I think it is worth it. The bread is very good! Here is the recipe I used:

1 c. flour
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp.
1 c. sugar
1 tsp. cinnamon
3 large eggs
1 c. oil (I used 1 cup applesauce instead)
1 tsp. vanilla
1 large package instant pudding (any kind)
1/2 c. milk
optional: 1 c. raisins, nuts, or chocolate chips

I went for the chocolate pudding, and added chocolate chips and walnuts. I also used whole wheat flour (just at this last add: I didn't want to mess with the chemistry the other times in case there was less gluten in the wheat flour.)



You generously grease two loaf pans, combine 3 T. sugar and 1 T. of cinnamon, and dust the sides and bottom of the pan. Bake at 325 degrees for 1 hour, and you are done!



The bread was great toasted in the morning with a little light butter. I froze the second loaf until I was ready for it, and it worked very well.



My second time around, I used butterscotch pudding, and butterscotch chips instead of the chocolate version. It didn't have a butterscotch flavor, just very sweet. This one was good with pumpkin butter.



That one was tasty, but I think I preferred the chocolate. Good luck with your bread, and if you start a starter, you can always give one to me! Next time I get one of these, I may make all eight loaves, freeze them, and just share THOSE with my friends ("Or eat them myself," said the Little Red Hen...)

Kinder Surprise

I've told you how much I love Joe Caputo's grocery store. Let me tell you how much. I dunno if you've read between the lines here, but Chris and I were seriously considering a move to Portland, which is just a wonderful place (now we'll find out if Chris' mom is really reading this blog.) We have 80-85% decided against it, and for Chris the big reasons are because his family and his sports teams are here. For me, the reasons to stay are the theatre scene and the extra-work I've been doing here, the fact that I am a true cold-weather jogger, the job that I love, and Joe Caputo's. Not necessarily in that order. I also just know that my cat wouldn't go poo for the entire three days it might take to get out there, and then he would detonate. He's a nervous poo-er.

So I got to take Ma into Caputo's when she was here, and she loved it, too. In the checkout line, which is always long, I freaked when I noticed this:



Ma has a degree in French, and she's always loved all things French. When Dave and I were kids, she had Asterix and Obelix hardcover books around the house, which she would generally have to read to us (as they were in French, and I think the Romans spoke in Latin.) The names translate to Asterisk (because he is the small one), and Obelisk (because he is the large one.) Anyway, later on, cartoons of the two appeared on the Disney Channel, if memory serves... And they were hilarious. The cartoon is based on Gaul's resistance to Roman occupation. The Gaul's drink a potion that makes them stronger, all except for Obelix -- who fell in a vat of it as a baby.

Caputo's has a wide selection of not only Italian stuff, but lots of imported food. So I had to grab one of the egg toys, for old times sake. They were little chocolate eggs with a prize inside of "Asterix and the Vikings."



When you open it, there is a little egg capsule inside the chocolate:



And inside the egg capsule is a figure and a comic! I was hoping to get Obelix, but I got a Viking. Still neat.



Le Gaulois en vie long!

Buffalo Grove Days, or, "Had Enough Crap Yet?"

In September, nothing wraps up a summer of eating battered and deep-fried nitrites on sticks quite like the last big party, when Chris and I walk over to the Buffalo Grove Days. In the past, we've had chocolate and marshmallow-covered popcorn, had too much crappy yellow beer that was intensely overpriced, and witnessed the phenomenon that is "Infinity." To date, however, nothing had quite offended my eyes and ears so much as this:



You read it right. It's called "You M8K It Super Slush Lab," a spelling that could only make me think of my friend Jenny, who has mentally collected the perverse misspellings used by Madison Avenue to sell non-food items to kids ever since I can remember (think words like Nyce, Stuf, Lite, Likkum Stix, and Chawklit). Her notes to me in junior high and high school were filled with artfully worked phrases like, "Heyyy, Shì Patì, hoo du yoo lyke two-day?" Originally, that's why I took the picture, just to show it to Jen. But then I stood and looked at it a bit longer.



The unit glows with every garish color in the day-glo rainbow, and plays freakish carnival music (you know the one, the "big top" organ tune, "dit dit dooty ditta dit da doo-tie...") to lure children; a kind of modern-day witch's candy house. Kids can spend as little as $3 on a cup and make their own Super Slush flavor combo. But how are you gonna fit all the flavors you want in a $3 cup, Junior? With a variety that includes Sour Apple, Extreme Watermelon, Power Kiwi Burst, Tubular FD & C Neon Green #8, and Radical Premature Type II Diabetes, you'd better get mom to open up her pocketbook for the $7 cup! And then get to the dentist now. No, like, NOW. Stick two straws and a plastic spoon in it, Fattie, and get back in the SUV!



I soon realized that this wasn't just an amusing phonetic misspelling. What I was in the presence of was absolutely everything that is evil about America, in one portable electric trailer. Nothing less. I was mesmerized by the flowing, frosty pumps of glowing sin, and Chris eventually had to drag me away.

Now, let's focus on what IS good in this country, try not to think any longer about what starving children overseas would think of this gross display, and move onto the food tent. Yay! I smell barbecue!



It takes awhile to decide what to eat in the food tent. Much like Cher noted in the movie Clueless, you have to do at least one full lap before you commit to a location. We finally decided that Chris would get the pulled pork BBQ sandwich from Brothers' BBQ, and I found a nice option in the chicken gyros from the Continental Restaurant tent. I also got an ear of steamed corn, I think from the Girl Scout tent.

The pulled pork was very good. The pork had no sauce, and then when your sandwich is made up, it is added over the top. After living in Nashville a short time, I now feel that this is the only real way to serve pulled pork, so I approved.



I didn't know that the Continental served chicken gyros, but now I might need to go there to get another one sometime. It wasn't grilled chicken breast, but that same sort of "meat roll" on a spit, just as the lamb gyro was. The tzatziki sauce was very thick, and I thought the whole thing was really tasty. It was a bit leaner than the lamb gyro probably would have been, but I'm okay with that.



Chris and I both crunched on the corn-on-the-cob, which had just come out of the steamer and was boiling hot. Additional butter was not available, but the corn was so sweet it really didn't need it. They did have chili seasoning and parmesan cheese, which I did make good use of. Delicious.

Being averse to sweetened drinks of any kind (artificial or not), I opted for a bottle of water. Chris decided to try a Lemon Shake-Up at Randy's stand, before the claustrophobia-inducing conditions of the tent finally got to me.



The drink came not in a cup, but in a large oil barrel. I did take a sip, and I thought it was very good for what it was, with lots of fresh lemon juice. The amount of sugar still made my teeth feel "furry," though, immediately. I just don't get the sugary drink thing anymore, I guess. But Chris liked it.

We strolled on home in the beautiful weather, with empty wallets and full stomachs. Ahhh, you know what? I love this country.

Devil Tongues

I've become fascinated, over the last year or two, with dipping various things in chocolate. It started with a friend at my old job (her name is also Gina) that brought in these no-bake cookies. She frosted one Ritz cracker with marshmallow fluff, one with a thin layer of peanut butter, and made a sandwich out of them. Then you dip the "cookie" in melted Hershey bar chocolate, and cool them on parchment paper in the fridge. They are UH. MAY. ZING. Do not deviate from Hershey bars, she warned me. Nothing else works.

Well, of course I experimented. You know how I am. I mean, in the Garden of Eden, the addition of a snake using his forked devil-tongue to talk me into anything that I know I shouldn't do would have been completely superfluous -- because I would have gone STRAIGHT for that tree the moment I was told not to. Also, I had chocolate chips at home that I needed to use up. But the chips dry too hard and have an unpleasant "crunch" that spoils the cookie... and if you add a little milk, you end up with what is basically bechamel sauce, and it will never totally dry (though it's great on ice cream... or cheesecake). So for anyone but the expert candy maker, I say, USE HERSHEY BARS. Be ye warned.

Also, when you are melting chocolate, use a double-boiler method. It is really easy to burn the chocolate, so use indirect heat, or microwave for a few seconds, and just keep stirring until it all melts together. Don't keep nuking it, or if using a double-boiler, take it OFF the heat.

So what I've done here is take the chili-coated dried mango slices that they sell at Trader Joe's, and dip half of those in chocolate, and cool them on parchment paper (they will not stick, and then you can put them all in a tupperware container). Have you had chili spice with chocolate? It is really wonderful. They are paired a lot in Latino cooking, and these "tongues" are not too hot -- just savory. I call them "devil tongues" because, well, that's what they look like, because they're a little bit spicy, and in honor of the little voice in my head that tells me to dip things in chocolate.

Don Roth's Blackhawk Restaurant

For my birthday a couple weeks ago, I chose the exact same restaurant we went to last year, and ordered exactly the same things. It sounds boring, but I had waited a whole year... And you can build up quite an appetite in that amount of time!

Don Roth's Blackhawk holds the current position of my very favorite restaurant. (Other than Roscoe's Chicken-n-Waffles, in L.A. More on that later). I love the history and the ambience... and I have now been lucky enough to have two perfect meals there. And sorry, in my anticipation and purtying up for the evening, I forgot the camera. Thank goodness for that camera phone!

Your meal begins with bread crisps that are covered with drawn butter, and huge amounts of sweet roasted garlic. Enough said, there.



Next, just as last year, we got the shrimp cocktail. Again, not reinventing the wheel here, but it is just a perfect example. The shrimp are large and perfect, and the cocktail sauce is sweet and made from scratch (I think so, anyway). It is almost like a sweet-and-sour sauce.



Don Roth's is famous for their "spinning salad bowl." They actually sell the salad dressing in the grocery store, but I hadn't thought much of it when I purchased it before I went to the restaurant. I recommend using it a marinade, though... So what happens in the house is, the server comes over and does this special sort of act with the salad prep in front of you. He will whizz the bowl around over a bed of ice, and add the house dressing and toss the salad as he does so. Then he add blue cheese dressing IN ADDITION TO THE HOUSE DRESSING. Yeah. Happy birthday to me! Then he offers you the choice of "anchovies, shrimp, or both?" Chris and I had not heard the "both" portion of the deal the last time, and we exchanged a look, like, "Oh, you know we're taking both."



You would think that I would be full by this point, but if it is possible, I think I was actually hungrier than when I came in.

Next step? My prime rib. This is the small, the smallest portion that they have (!) The server asked me how I wanted it done, and of course the answer to that is, "however it comes off when the cook slices it is how I want it on the plate." That'll be approximately medium-rare.

And you GOTS to get the twice-baked potato. Now, I am very picky about my TBP's. At our wedding reception, my mother-in-law was pushing for the selection of that restaurant's twice-baked... But though the otherwise utterly fantastic food was the reason we chose Monastero's (and I mean, like your sainted mother made it herself), I knew that, weirdly, the potatoes were the kind that come frozen. (You can always tell this by those perfect little machine-placed whipped peaks on the top.) She thinks they are great, but I say she can keep 'em (we got the risotto, with peas, which was terrif). Anyway, I want my TBP mixed up on the spot with real cheese and sour cream. I mean, those are fine, but who wants to go to a restaurant for something you can buy at Jewel? Well, if you are the same way I am, Roth's will not disappoint!



Afterwards, I awaited my large red balloon and free dessert. This last visit found the restaurant quite a bit busier than the last time, I guess since it actually was St. Patrick's Day. I gave up on the candle and the song, and asked for a dessert menu. My waiter said, "Oh, I got something special coming for ya!"



I can see why he thought I would like it. Chris' instructions were, "something so chocolatey you could die from it." We got a chocolate cake with a scoop of vanilla, and hot fudge. While I thought the flourless torte we got last time was better, I thought the hot fudge was insanely good.



You can see how much we hated it.

UPDATE: Sadly, the owners of the Blackhawk have retired, and their children did not follow them into the business. Don Roth's closed in December of 2009.

Because Jesus Eats Better Than All the Saints

Halloween is great for a harvest of junkfood. But, if you're like me, you're not so into Smarties and Abba Zabba. I usually mine out the Kit-Kat and the mini candy bars and shun the rest.

The Christmas holiday, however, seems to offer up a whole different class of goodies. Our haul this year includes truffles, brownies, chocolate mints, pears, baklava, fudge, and chocolate cherries from Harry and David. I also have the company of my old friends, the Three Torrone Characters -- whose names and origins I know not, but whose corresponding flavors I know so well. We also got biscotti, amaretti cookies, and some of those chocolate-covered spoons to stir your coffee with. Woo-hoo!

Tiramisu

PHOO! I've been gone a long time. October was particularly busy, with all-weekend anesthesia courses to complete (on my other blog, I may post pics of me getting, and giving, nine injections in the oral cavity on a Sunday night. Nothing like it.) Now that I've primed your appetite, let me tell ya, I'm still taking pictures!

I had never heard of tiramisu, probably, until I began dating my husband. In my family, we rarely ate Italian in restaurants. Aside from our favorite restaurant which used to on Wabash called Cafe Angelo in the Oxford House hotel (now the Hotel Monaco), *** an order of tomato gravy that invariably came with green peppers in a sauce that was gorily undercooked to a bright red would leave us disgusted and seeking Chinese cuisine the next time out. But Chris' family? Oh, they love to eat in restaurants. And my mother-in-law, who moved here from Italy at eight years old, always selects Italian or "just regular American." And they always pay, so who am I to argue? Chris and I pretty much leave the experimentation in exotic cuisines to our own time.

Anyway, something that always seems to be on the menu in any Italian restaurant (especially the nicer class of them that my in-laws favor that by the way, can also competently cook a white or a red sauce) is tiramisu. It also frequents the Food Network. It looked so easy that a couple of years ago I tried Giada's recipe.

I made a few alterations that I think made all the difference. First of all, authentic or not, I can't make anything with rum in it. Let's just say that a few experiences in my twenties left rum on my "never drink again" list. So I substituted with amaretto liquor. While tasting the marscarpone mixture, I also doubled the sugar (still just 6 tablespoons total), and added a capful of vanilla extract. I've used fresh bakery ladyfingers, but the shrink-wrapped kind from the Italian grocer actually seem to work better. I have an unsweetened cocoa and chocolate mixture that my brother got me some time ago from Ghirardelli, and I dust that between layers and on top. Lastly, I don't usually have espresso on hand, so I substitute with strong coffee, preferrably the stuff that has been evaporating/condensing in the pot since morning.



Chocolate chunks on top of this one, I know, totally unnecessary, but I didn't have block chocolate, and I was too lazy to shave each individual hunk. Now ask me if I regret it. NO.



The Witt family seems to like it. For the Christmas holiday shown above, my MIL had gotten some wonderfully fresh torrone -- the best I've ever tasted. She also had the panettone. My bro brought the amaretti cookies. It was a real meeting of the minds. Stomachs.

*** Cafe Angelo is STILL my favorite Italian restaurant. I read some time ago that the former owner opened another restaurant in the suburbs... and then I lost the name. They have a dance floor and they play Sinatra tunes. If anyone out there knows, let me know!

UPDATE: Holy crud, I'm getting good at answering my own questions. Angelo Nicelli now owns the Porto Bello Italian Steakhouse in suburban Lake Zurich. We'll be checking that out soon (and taking pictures, of course.)

UPDATE on the UPDATE: Sadly, it appears that Porto Bello is no longer open. Nuts.

Kira's Brownies

As promised, I made Kira's brownies the very next day after she posted about them in a comment (see Kira's blog on my blogroll: "Shovel-It-In.") She stated that she uses the "one bowl" brownie recipe on the back of the Baker's unsweetened chocolate box. She said she also adds extra chocolate morsels and macadamia nuts. I did the same, except I added half a bag of chocolate and peanut butter morsels that I had. And next time I will crush up the nuts a bit smaller, instead of just throwing them in the way I did. I was in a big hurry to get these things in my mouwf.

Well, the resulting recipe will go next to my cornbread as an Untouchable for all time. I don't think I'll ever make another brownie. The morsels melted all through the mix, and the top is crispy and the inside, when heated for ten seconds each time in the micro, is a fresh and chocolate-lava gooey as the day it was born. Wait, I hate the word "gooey." And yet that it what it is. God is it gooey, and dare I say the forbidden word? Moist?

Thank you Kira. You've changed my life yet again!